Here is a copy of the list I wrote last night in bed. I could not sleep even though I watched the requisite late night Star Trek:Next Generation and 48Hours. So forgive any strange errors, I'm typing this the way I wrote it last night:
--Do Not eat any more bite size snickers bars. The three you consumed yesterday plus any you might shove into your mouth today will make you gain back all 40 pounds you've lost since October in one day. And then you'll cry a lot.
--Name Max something else. Or don't call her Max. Tired of everyone thinking that she's a boy, but then isn't that the idea of the cute short little name anyways? Ok, Maxine Jane forever it is. Ugh, that's long.
--Find an appropriate penalty for Jeremiah for leaving the t.v. on all night. Maybe it will be penalty enough when our pretty new t.v. burns out from over use. Hmph.
--Drink less coffee. Teeth are going to be yellow and unfortunately crooked for life now. Fuck. Fuck you coffee and wisdom teeth, you've made me a fucking mess.
--Find some really super nice teenager with no friends but no pent up anger from not having any friends to be Elijah's babysitter once a weekend.
--Whoops. Forgot to take that multi-vitamin my mom is insisting I take. I hate vitamins.
--Write blog post about how stupid people are and how fed up with society you are. Then gloat to Jeremiah about how awesome and insightful you are.
--Clean out the pantry you damn dirty.
--Make myself a giant blanket of luxury soft merino wool and then walk around the house all day wrapped up in it. No more cooking, can't ruin blanket.
--Read Max Llama Llama Mad at Mama a million more times before she goes to her dad's house tonight. A MILLION MORE TIMES.
--Instead of fretting over what kind of neat storage I'm going to put in the gameroom for the millions of toys and books piled up in the corner... throw them all away. All of them. Even Llama Llama Mad at Mama. Pinkilicious. One Cranky Angry Bear. chubby baby Julia. Giant basket of trucks. All 407 stuffed animals. Even the bunnies. (OK maybe not bunnies)
--Stop pinching stomach fat right now. It's not going anywhere tonight, enjoy the warmth it creates.
--Order Color Ink cartridges for the printer. Everyone hates me for being cheap. Everyone.
--Grow taller. you won't look so fat at 5'7'' instead of 5'2''.
--Look up Ben Folds tour dates. Ask Jeremiah if we can go see him again. This time cry when Jeremiah rolls his eyes. Then mope all day and sing You To Thank, The Luckiest or Gone in an annoying loud tone. LOUD, ERIN.
Typing this out is painful. The funny thing is this list took up two pages front and back in a notebook. Must have been all the doodles in between the bullets of the list. The doodles were mostly all bunnies. I love bunnies.
--Get a bunny. Put it in a crate in the corner, complain about how much it stinks and how hard it is to clean up after. Fucking disgusting bunny.