Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Preventable Diseases (have nothing to do with this post)

You may or may not have noticed that my blogging has not been as prolific lately as it has been in the past. I blame lots of things for this sad lack of blogging.

1: My Damn Kids: You'd think it was my job to take care of them or something!? Elijah demands ridiculous things like food or help getting dressed. What's up with that! Last night I had to make dinner, clean it up and then actually watch a movie with them. I mean, HELLO! It's disturbing how much pressure I'm under from these mini-beings.

2: My Jobs: I love making warm winter accessories for people and I love writing, but do I really have to do things like write invoices, edit, take photos and advertise!? So Much Work. If only I could make enough money to pay something to take care of the kids and advertise for my business. Have you seen my new items?! There is still time to make your custom order for Christmas! Check out Ultra Cute Crochet and help a brother out.

Already have the crocheting thing in the bag? Check out my day job at Crochet Spot for patterns, tutorials and fun crochet related posts!

3: Taking Care of the House/Laundry: Yesterday I washed, dried, folded and put away 7 loads of laundry. 7 LOADS! I also scrubbed the tub, toilet and sink in the bathroom, washed four loads of dishes (no, I don't have a dishwasher...and it's not from lack of funds...there's literally no room for one in our kitchen), cleaned Max and Elijah's room and dusted in the front room. Today I hope to ignore all the house work so tomorrow it will be such a mess that I will cry from the overwhelming nature of it all.

Ok, that's it. I guess it's not as much as I previously thought AND is a bit more sad rather than funny.


4: This Recent Illness: I guess I shouldn't complain because I've only had this cold since Sunday night. BUT FOR GOD'S SAKE! My eyes are constantly watering, my throat aches, I can't breathe out of my nose and worst of all; I CAN'T TASTE ANYTHING. Eating makes me feel better and this illness has taken away my only joy. My only joy ever in the history of the world. Eating. Well, fuck that, I'm going to go stuff my face anyways.

I'll leave you with this photo of me so you can share in some of my wretched pain:

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Rosey Vs. My Piano Man

Rosey received an MP3 player from her Dad LAST CHRISTMAS and last night brought it home from his house unopened.

She then proceeded to annoy us until we figured it out and uploaded songs onto it. And by 'us' I mean she proceeded to annoy Jeremiah until he figured it out and uploaded songs onto it. It turned out that the brand she had was the same as Jeremiah's old MP3 player and he didn't have to upload a new driver etc...etc...and we were all spared from hearing a few choice swear words during his inevitable frustrations.

"WHAT THE FUCK!?!?!!!" is his favorite exclamation.

Regardless, I was upstairs 'working' in my 'studio' and was listening to Rose and Jeremiah search through my music on the home computer.

Sadly for all of us, out of hundreds of songs, Rose could only pick 20. 20 songs out of all of my songs!!!!!

She loves The Killers and I happened to have a few of their songs, so that saved the day. Two Britney Spears songs (leave me alone!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!), one Evanescence song and some other 'pop' songs that I didn't even know I had.

The conversation was pretty funny to me from upstairs though. Jeremiah was paging through my songs and it pretty much went like this:

"Rose, I'm not sure if there's anything you like on here..."

"Just keep looking."

Jeremiah sighs very deeply and continues, "Ok...Ben Folds...Ben Folds....Ben Folds....Cake...Ben Folds...Bob Dylan....Ben Folds..."

Rose yells up the stairs:

"GEEZ! MOM! You don't have much variety here!" She's so whiny it hurts.

"ROSEY! I wasn't prepared to have a ten year old looking through my songs. MY SONGS being the imperial words."

Jeremiah laughs, loudly,"Erin, you're using imperial incorrectly in that sentence."

"Look it up, Mister Smarty Pants. Imperial is one of those words that can be applied in any sentence, really..." I am obviously certain that he is right.

"Ok ok ok." Rosey begins to acquiesce, "I like a few Ben Folds songs, I just don't know the names of them. Can we play through them and I'll tell you which ones I like?"

Jeremiah is a pillar of strength and patience here. After sorting through five or six Ben Folds albums Rosey picks two songs.

"I'm sorry I didn't pick more...Mom just listens to the rest of them over and over again...I'm so sick of Ben Folds."

I can't hear Jeremiah's response, but I assume his curly crowned head is bobbing up and down in solemn agreement.

So here I am first thing the next morning, searching through Amazon's free MP3's for songs my 10 year old daughter would like. Yes, I'm cheap.

Oh! Look!

There's a deal on the download of Ben Fold's new album! Score!

I guess Rosey is just going to have to learn not to be sick of Ben Folds anymore.

Friday, November 12, 2010

Maxism for the People!

Max is on from the time she wakes up until the time she goes to sleep.

And she is constantly and consistently at odds with someone or something. This morning I woke up before sunrise to her freezing cold hands on my back.

"Mom! My hands are cold. Will you hold me?"

Thanks for the newsflash and the delightful wake up, Maxine.

Later in the morning we're getting ready for school and I'm pouring her cereal into her favorite bowl and I already have her favorite spoon in the bowl. She dives into the cereal and eats, then looks at the spoon and starts to whimper, first softly and then slowly the soft whimper began to morph into a low, but very loud wail. The huffing and puffing, the coughing and the gagging soon followed. I tried to calm her but couldn't understand what she could possibly be upset about. Rose finally calmed her by distracting her and pointing out the giant crow that had just landed in the backyard.

"HOLY COW! I thought they only had crows that big in Texas!"

Later as I was walking them out the door to the bus stop I asked her what happened at breakfast.

"I know you think that's my favorite spoon MOM. But it's not. And it hurts my feelings that you don't know the difference between my favorite and the one that just looks like my favorite." (Max proununciations: foon for spoon, fweelings for feelings, fave-o-wit for favorite, wooks for looks)

"I'm sorry Maxine, when you get home from school you'll have to show me the difference."

"You can bet your pretty panties I will MOM!"

What!? haha.

Did you notice I'm having a 'free shipping' sale!? Go and check out my site Ultra Cute Crochet for deals and sales on the warmest, awesomest handmade accessories this side of the Mogonoghalawawa! (Another Max-ism)

Sunday, November 7, 2010

A Walk with Pappy

There aren't many times in my existence when I think, "This is just perfect.". I have a hard time enjoying myself because of this. I am always worrying about things that have to be done tomorrow, of what might happen if I do something incorrectly in a certain situation, what could be done to make whatever I'm doing better for not just myself, but for everyone around me. It kind of sucks.

A few weeks ago I had a wonderful experience with my Daddy and Elijah. It was near perfect, except for the fact that it had to ever end. We took Elijah on a mini nature walk, and had to walk some distance from my parent's home to get to the woods, but it was wonderful. Elijah was a real trooper and walked most of the time, but Daddy did bear the brunt of Elijah's weight more than I did, which was nice!

Thank you Daddy, if you ever get a chance (or the inclination) to read this. You're a paragon of patience putting up with me and still wanting to hang out with me after 29 years.

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

Politics and Facebook

Today I decided to have a little socio-political experiment on The Book of Faces. I wrote a status that was mainly based on a inside joke Jeremiah and I have here at home. He likes to call me a 'Damn Hippy', 'Tree Hugger', calls Obama 'my man' etc...etc... as a joke.

We also have a joke about his mom and some other people we know who have been known to vote 'straight ticket'. So I combined the two things and was curious to see where it would end up.

Me: "I just voted- straight ticket democrat. What do think about that?"
about an hour ago

Dr. Monkey Muck likes this.

Un-named friend of Jeremiah's: it all makes sense now

Un-named friend of mine: You got a sticker anyway.

Un-named friend of Jeremiah's: I think you're 19? Or a liberal arts student?

My lovely cousin: Retard

Jeremiah: I knew it.

My momma's cousin, my second cousin?: sorry to hear about your accident, must have bee a terrible blow to the head

Un-named Friend of Jeremiah's who also made the first comment: what did your kids ever do to you?

Lovely Cousin's husband: I think everyone's entitled to their own opinion.

Although my status was a joke and I had intended to respond within an hour or so and give my actual opinion and political stance, I decided to leave it as is and not just shoot off pithy comments back at my commenters on facebook, which was my first inclination.

I grew up in a home with parents that had often opposing views on a plethora of different areas ranging from health and home to politics and religion. Neither one ever called the other one stupid or idiotic, neither one told the other that they were wrong or retarded. Even when my Dad begrudging admitted to voting for Ross Perot my Mom kept her giant mouth shut. When I told my parents I wanted to vote for George W. Bush in 2000 my Momma didn't protest. She was pushed to her limits though and later cutely elbowed me some time during in 2004 and said 'I told you he was a dickhead.'.

If you prevent someone from fleshing out their own opinions based on what they themselves come up with after investigating all the facts and options, you're no better than those 'Damn Commies' I read someone bitching about on facebook earlier today.

I have never voted a straight ticket. I have never voted because I was bullied, coerced, bribed or tricked. I have never voted based on someone else's opinion, on who looks the nicest, on who served in which war or on which candidate might own the nicest house or has the most cars. I have never voted without researching my candidates and being aware of what each one was representing themselves as.

Have I mentioned that I've never actually voted? Which is also my right.