Friday, July 9, 2010

Cute Queries


Maxine Jane has been known to think deeply on certain subjects and often for long periods of time. What kind of puppy would be best for which baby doll sweater, what kind of food a certain kind of made up monster would like (most recently there was a discussion about whether the Carrot Head Monster would eat carrots or not), why eyes are brown, green or blue and not pink, purple or teal and other earth shattering topics of great importance.

Lately these deep thoughts have manifested themselves in queries addressed to me at odd and inappropriate times.

I'm tucking her in for the fourth time of the night and I'm getting a bit frustrated. I have just given her a 'dwinky' of water and now I'm kissing and hugging her goodnight.

"Momma?"

"Yes Max?"

"Would you rather go swimming by yourself on a really hot day or play with a friend without swimming and be hot but eat cookies and popsicles?"

"Ummm...I'd probably rather play with the friend and eat cookies and popsicles. Swimming by yourself would get boring kind of fast."

"Yep. I think so too. Good night Momma."

"Goodnight Max."

Further questions came while I was in the bathroom on the toilet. Max comes in and despite my obvious uncomfortable position she queries away:

"Momma. Would you rather have a really nice wild animal as a pet, but it might not be that cute, like an alligator or a rhino, or have a really mean puppy dog? ...but the puppy is really cute!"

"Oh boy Maxine Jane. Neither, probably. I don't like animals."

"But Momma, if it's really cute and really nice you'll love it even if you don't usually like animals. Don't you understand?"

"Ok Max. Whatever you say...it's obvious that you thought a lot about it....can you leave me alone now so I can finish pooping?"

"Sorry Momma."

She leaves the bathroom and stands outside the door. From there she continues explaining why a nice alligator would be a better pet than a mean puppy. Believe it or not, she's quite convincing.

The last question she's asked me many times over the last week of very hot weather. She asks me while I'm working, she asks me while I'm on the phone, she yells it down the basement steps while I' m doing laundry and most often while I'm tucking her in for the night.

"Momma. Would you rather be it be hot or cold?

"Well. There are nice things about both."

"I like it to be cold, so you can wear footy jammies to bed every night. Cause when it's hot you're always damp...like a pop can."

"That's a very good thought, Max. But don't you hate shivering or how cold it is when you get out of the bath tub or how you can't play outside that often because of the cold and the snow?"

"No."

"Okay. Goodnight Maxine Jane."

"Goodnight Momma."

6 comments:

Ms. Moon said...

Well, as they used to say in the olden days, That girl is a corker!"

Nicole said...

Absolutely adorable! She certainly does a lot of pondering...

Deidra said...

You'll want to document these moments. Videotape her if you can! Of course, you've done good already by posting about it!

Today, my brother and friend and I all discussed our childhoods, and I always wish I had documentation of those most priceless moments. I'm sure Maxine will have a blast hearing about her questions when she's older!

Megs said...

I just re-discovered you! You are hilarious.

I am a little embarrassed, but I gave you an award on my blog. You can, you know, have it if you want.

You're Lucky I Don't Have a Gun... said...

lol- "like a pop can"

that's not something you hear everyday in southern CA.

Logical Libby said...

It would take a lot of convincing for me to see the upside of a pet alligator. Even a nice one.