I've been dieting, trying to work out healthy alternatives to my inclination to just not eat and just generally feeling down in the dumps about my appearance. This too will pass but sometimes it helps to write things out.
An exercise in self-exploration.
I am a woman.
I love being a woman.
I like the space around my waist where it begins to curve out into my hips.
I like my small feet.
I like the way my shoulders look when I’m topless.
I like the way my lips look with pink gloss on them, the same pink gloss that I’ve been wearing since I was 12.
I like having the door held open for me.
I like when Jeremiah puts his hand on the small of my back while we’re walking.
I like the weight of his body behind me, on top of me, beside me.
I like that my voice is light and girly.
I like that I’m my daddy’s girl.
I like that my mom and I can talk about being a mom and what to cook for dinner.
I like carrying my babies in my womb for months and months, having them all to myself.
I like bringing them into the world to meet their family, the people that already love them.
I like holding them to my breast and feeding them from my own body.
But
I hate being talked down to because my voice is light and girly.
I hate not being able to find adult sneakers because my feet are so small.
I hate that I can’t eat whatever I want whenever I want it.
I hate that my parents think I can’t handle things on my own.
I hate the medical community handling me like a child during my pregnancies and labors.
I hate that some men assume that I am manipulative just because I have boobs and a cunt.
And in the end, the pros greatly outweigh the cons.
Tonight when I wash my face before bed I’ll look in the mirror and be glad that my face is so feminine.
I’ll go into each of my children’s rooms and check on them.
I’ll be glad that I’m their mother, the only mother they’ll ever have.
I’ll go to bed with Jeremiah and be glad for the smell of him, the weight of him, the fact that I don’t have to carry his masculinity on my shoulders as he does on his.
I’ll fall asleep and have dreams of lovely books I have read, colors that I love, nightmares that haunt me.
I might wake up weeping softly, and even then I'll be glad that I can weep openly and freely…
Because I am a woman.
Wednesday, September 30, 2009
Tuesday, September 29, 2009
Max's Digestive Tract Talks to Me...Often
And now on to something completely different...
Well, not all that different considering I will mention my children in this post.
(this one's for you, Prosy)
Max was upstairs pooping and I was downstairs cleaning up the mess of Doctor toys she and Elijah had scattered all over our gameroom. I've been wiping Max since she was finally potty trained a few months ago....better very very late than never, right?
She yells for me from the bathroom to wipe her, and I didn't hear what she was calling me for. Sometimes she'll say "Mom...I'm still pooping." or "Momma, did you hear me say I'm going to the potty???" or "Mom....stay downstairs while I poop....but I'll still call you when I'm done."
So since it was soon after she went upstairs, I assumed that she said something along those lines and just said, "OK. Max!" and went on cleaning.
A few moments later,
"MOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMAAAAAAAA! There's poop hanging from my butt for you to clean up!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
What a delight. I just like the way she worded it...like the poop is waiting for me.
"Come to me, Erin. I am the product of your daughter Maxine's digestive system. Go-Gurt and cheese make their way through her stomach and intestines just for you...for you, Erin, it's all for you...."
Elijah's party this weekend went smoothly. We had lots of fruit and veggies, the older kids played outside with my dad pretty much the entire time and I only had one piece of pizza! I was super proud of myself.
Although staying away from the delicious chocolate cake with blueberry icing Max and I made earlier that day was nearly impossible, I persevered. I did try one bite last night of the leftovers. Pretty darn good.
Before the party Max, Elijah and I went on a long walk. I snapped a few photos of them goofing around. I didn't notice that the background looks right out of a scene from The Wire (Jeremiah and I are watching Season 2 from Netflix so don't you dare give anything away if you've seen the show!!!).
West Baltimore in the House Fools. Or whatever.
Also, if you haven't already heard that Ms. Moon finally has her long awaited precious grandson.
I've never thought about waiting for a baby from different perspectives. I've never been close with anyone other than my mom or my aunt who were having babies, and that was just like getting more siblings, and I've obviously waited for my own children.
It's neat to hear her talk about it from the anxious grandmother's viewpoint and I'm very glad her daughter had such a successful labor.
Congratulations to Lily and Jason...and to Ms. Moon and her new best friend, Owen.
Well, not all that different considering I will mention my children in this post.
(this one's for you, Prosy)
Max was upstairs pooping and I was downstairs cleaning up the mess of Doctor toys she and Elijah had scattered all over our gameroom. I've been wiping Max since she was finally potty trained a few months ago....better very very late than never, right?
She yells for me from the bathroom to wipe her, and I didn't hear what she was calling me for. Sometimes she'll say "Mom...I'm still pooping." or "Momma, did you hear me say I'm going to the potty???" or "Mom....stay downstairs while I poop....but I'll still call you when I'm done."
So since it was soon after she went upstairs, I assumed that she said something along those lines and just said, "OK. Max!" and went on cleaning.
A few moments later,
"MOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMAAAAAAAA! There's poop hanging from my butt for you to clean up!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
What a delight. I just like the way she worded it...like the poop is waiting for me.
"Come to me, Erin. I am the product of your daughter Maxine's digestive system. Go-Gurt and cheese make their way through her stomach and intestines just for you...for you, Erin, it's all for you...."
Elijah's party this weekend went smoothly. We had lots of fruit and veggies, the older kids played outside with my dad pretty much the entire time and I only had one piece of pizza! I was super proud of myself.
Although staying away from the delicious chocolate cake with blueberry icing Max and I made earlier that day was nearly impossible, I persevered. I did try one bite last night of the leftovers. Pretty darn good.
Before the party Max, Elijah and I went on a long walk. I snapped a few photos of them goofing around. I didn't notice that the background looks right out of a scene from The Wire (Jeremiah and I are watching Season 2 from Netflix so don't you dare give anything away if you've seen the show!!!).
West Baltimore in the House Fools. Or whatever.
Also, if you haven't already heard that Ms. Moon finally has her long awaited precious grandson.
I've never thought about waiting for a baby from different perspectives. I've never been close with anyone other than my mom or my aunt who were having babies, and that was just like getting more siblings, and I've obviously waited for my own children.
It's neat to hear her talk about it from the anxious grandmother's viewpoint and I'm very glad her daughter had such a successful labor.
Congratulations to Lily and Jason...and to Ms. Moon and her new best friend, Owen.
Friday, September 25, 2009
Happy Birthday Elijah.
Painfully waddling down the hot city sidewalk I finally reach my destination and entered the airconditioned Dr.’s office. My abdomen is swollen with my son, my first son, Jeremiah’s first child, my fourth and final baby.
I’m still a little sad that people were staring at me while passing by. I supposed they just wondered if maybe I was carrying multiples, which is becoming more and more common. I'm bigger than any person I've ever known carrying one baby, my whole stomach shakes when Elijah moves.
I’m weighed by the nurse, she smiles and pinches me. I’ve gained 2 pounds in one week.
The Dr. checks me, grimaces. 2 cm dilated. I’m only 36 weeks.
I worry, my face flushes and I glance at Jeremiah beside me. He’s calm, unworried…
The day before I had an ultrasound. Today the Dr. is telling us our son is already 8 pounds, but it’s most probable that his lungs have not developed. The Dr. wants me to keep my feet up and rest as much as possible.
We make a date for induction. Sept. 25th. 38 weeks gestation..
At 26 weeks I had woke up early in the morning with contractions. We went to the hospital and the nurses could not stop the labor. Finally after hours, medications and threats of life-flighting us to children’s hospital my labor stopped. All was well.
Things go smoothly for the next few weeks after the Dr.’s 36 week visit. I rest, the girls are anxious and want me to play. I’m tired of being pregnant, of not being able to lift anything or play with my daughters. I’m tired of people staring at me.
I want to meet my son, my first son, Jeremiah’s first child, my fourth and final baby.
Jeremiah is anxious, but sweet. He loves us and shows it everyday.
The night before the scheduled induction we take the girls to my mom’s house, visit, then tuck them into bed and head home. I get into my P.J.’s , Jeremiah tucks me in (because I insisted and he couldn’t say no) and then the contractions start.
They started low like menstrual cramps and then spread in warm circles across my abdomen. My whole body started to react. I felt flushed, nauseous, then full of frenetic energy and finally as the contraction ended, surprisingly calm. I had pre term labor many times and assumed (for some odd reason) that’s what was happening.
Jeremiah became amazingly excited when I called for him from across our home and told him about the contractions.
Practically bouncing off the walls, he told me, “This is it, Baby! I can just tell.”
I got into the shower and after a few minutes smugly told him that the contractions had stopped. I guess regardless of my physical status, I always have to be right.
He waited for me and handed me a towel as I got out of the shower…and the contractions began again.
We got ready and went right up to the hospital. The nurse checked me and confirmed that we were indeed in labor. I was 4 cm dilated. Then she asked me if I wanted an epidural.
I looked at Jeremiah and he said, “Whatever you want, Baby.”. And for some odd reason I said yes. I’m not against epidurals and had even had one after laboring 12 hours with Maxine (it went on to last 26 hours total)…but I’ve never been a fan either and had been assuming I would not have one.
The Dr. came in, did the epidural and then Jeremiah and I spent the next five hours watching t.v., talking, relaxing and drifting in and out of sleep. There’s nowhere I’d rather be than with Jeremiah, as long as he’s in the room with me I’m good and good we were.
The lights were low, just us and the occasional nurse. I was in labor, but it seemed like a surreal blur. A picture in time playing back slowly and smudged with cloudy marks…
Any calmness was abruptly ended around 3:30am. I was on my side and all of the sudden felt like the baby was coming out. I asked Jeremiah to look and he didn’t see anything. He went and got the nurse and the Dr. (who was just about to come into the room and check me). They rolled me over and Elijah just started coming out. I was scared, afraid because of the urgency of it all.
No stirrups, no set up, no ‘tools’…the Dr. was just putting on gloves as Elijah’s whole head was out. It was messy and I was sitting upright and could see everything.
Jeremiah was flushed and I could tell he was worried too.
The Dr. was laughing when he told me to give a little push.
Elijah was born on the sheets in front of me, close enough to touch and caress at 3:55am, September 25th, 2007. The nurse and the Dr. were loudly giggling and talking about how big he was.
To me he looked tiny.
And blue.
Despite the lack of concern from the Dr. and the nurses, Jeremiah and I panicked a wee bit. We kept asking if he was okay, looking anxiously at the nurse suctioning his mouth.
He was fine. More than fine, he was 10 pounds 14 ounces. 20 inches long. He had dark brown hair and those classic dark blue newborn eyes. He looked at me briefly the first time I held him and anxiously nursed with no problem for a few moments before the nurses took him away to clean him up.
Elijah Christopher. My first son, Jeremiah’s first child, my fourth and final baby.
I’m still a little sad that people were staring at me while passing by. I supposed they just wondered if maybe I was carrying multiples, which is becoming more and more common. I'm bigger than any person I've ever known carrying one baby, my whole stomach shakes when Elijah moves.
I’m weighed by the nurse, she smiles and pinches me. I’ve gained 2 pounds in one week.
The Dr. checks me, grimaces. 2 cm dilated. I’m only 36 weeks.
I worry, my face flushes and I glance at Jeremiah beside me. He’s calm, unworried…
The day before I had an ultrasound. Today the Dr. is telling us our son is already 8 pounds, but it’s most probable that his lungs have not developed. The Dr. wants me to keep my feet up and rest as much as possible.
We make a date for induction. Sept. 25th. 38 weeks gestation..
At 26 weeks I had woke up early in the morning with contractions. We went to the hospital and the nurses could not stop the labor. Finally after hours, medications and threats of life-flighting us to children’s hospital my labor stopped. All was well.
Things go smoothly for the next few weeks after the Dr.’s 36 week visit. I rest, the girls are anxious and want me to play. I’m tired of being pregnant, of not being able to lift anything or play with my daughters. I’m tired of people staring at me.
I want to meet my son, my first son, Jeremiah’s first child, my fourth and final baby.
Jeremiah is anxious, but sweet. He loves us and shows it everyday.
The night before the scheduled induction we take the girls to my mom’s house, visit, then tuck them into bed and head home. I get into my P.J.’s , Jeremiah tucks me in (because I insisted and he couldn’t say no) and then the contractions start.
They started low like menstrual cramps and then spread in warm circles across my abdomen. My whole body started to react. I felt flushed, nauseous, then full of frenetic energy and finally as the contraction ended, surprisingly calm. I had pre term labor many times and assumed (for some odd reason) that’s what was happening.
Jeremiah became amazingly excited when I called for him from across our home and told him about the contractions.
Practically bouncing off the walls, he told me, “This is it, Baby! I can just tell.”
I got into the shower and after a few minutes smugly told him that the contractions had stopped. I guess regardless of my physical status, I always have to be right.
He waited for me and handed me a towel as I got out of the shower…and the contractions began again.
We got ready and went right up to the hospital. The nurse checked me and confirmed that we were indeed in labor. I was 4 cm dilated. Then she asked me if I wanted an epidural.
I looked at Jeremiah and he said, “Whatever you want, Baby.”. And for some odd reason I said yes. I’m not against epidurals and had even had one after laboring 12 hours with Maxine (it went on to last 26 hours total)…but I’ve never been a fan either and had been assuming I would not have one.
The Dr. came in, did the epidural and then Jeremiah and I spent the next five hours watching t.v., talking, relaxing and drifting in and out of sleep. There’s nowhere I’d rather be than with Jeremiah, as long as he’s in the room with me I’m good and good we were.
The lights were low, just us and the occasional nurse. I was in labor, but it seemed like a surreal blur. A picture in time playing back slowly and smudged with cloudy marks…
Any calmness was abruptly ended around 3:30am. I was on my side and all of the sudden felt like the baby was coming out. I asked Jeremiah to look and he didn’t see anything. He went and got the nurse and the Dr. (who was just about to come into the room and check me). They rolled me over and Elijah just started coming out. I was scared, afraid because of the urgency of it all.
No stirrups, no set up, no ‘tools’…the Dr. was just putting on gloves as Elijah’s whole head was out. It was messy and I was sitting upright and could see everything.
Jeremiah was flushed and I could tell he was worried too.
The Dr. was laughing when he told me to give a little push.
Elijah was born on the sheets in front of me, close enough to touch and caress at 3:55am, September 25th, 2007. The nurse and the Dr. were loudly giggling and talking about how big he was.
To me he looked tiny.
And blue.
Despite the lack of concern from the Dr. and the nurses, Jeremiah and I panicked a wee bit. We kept asking if he was okay, looking anxiously at the nurse suctioning his mouth.
He was fine. More than fine, he was 10 pounds 14 ounces. 20 inches long. He had dark brown hair and those classic dark blue newborn eyes. He looked at me briefly the first time I held him and anxiously nursed with no problem for a few moments before the nurses took him away to clean him up.
Elijah Christopher. My first son, Jeremiah’s first child, my fourth and final baby.
Thursday, September 24, 2009
Reconnecting and Pooping (okay so no pooping)
Yesterday I 'reconnected' on facebook with one of my favorite friends from high school, Natalie.
After talking with her I decided to get out one of my photo memory boxes and post some old photos of us and of a few people that are my friends on facebook. I'll share a couple here too.
This is my mom in 1983. Cute! (and the jury is out on whether she is my friend on facebook or if my little sister, also on facebook even though she's 12, made her a fake profile)
This is me and Nat all dressed up to go to some Goth thingy. We're only 16 in this picture, which makes me very upset, considering I have daughters. Some much older girl dressed us up that night and I'm sure my parents had no idea what we were doing.
Me and Nat later that night, looking decidedly younger.
Nat and Jarred who ran the local record store I worked at as a kid. I'd rarely, if ever, get paid with anything other than manic panic hair dye, cd's or lp's.
This is me and my cousin Kristen at my high school graduation.
Tomorrow is my baby's birthday. Elijah is going to be 2 years old. It actually gave me slight butterflies to even post that.
I held down the weaning fort and haven't nursed him in ten days. I've also been dieting for ten days, but I don't have a scale so I have no idea if I'd made any progress.
I'm trying out the Lacto-Ovo-Pescetarian diet, even though most of my life I've been just your plain old run of the mill vegetarian. My dad has been a vegetarian since I was a small kiddo and we have very similar tastes, so it's much easier for me to not eat meat than your average bear.
I'm eating shellfish and fish this time so I can still go on my Japanese dates with Jeremiah and get my Pretty Girl roll!
Here is my new plan:
I've started eating cereal, measured out Multi-Grain cheerios and one piece of fruit for breakfast.
For lunch I try to eat all veggies. With maybe a little homemade dressing.
I have 1/4 of a cup of mixed nuts for a snack before the girls come home from school.
And one serving of whatever I'm making for dinner, unless it has meat in it...then I'll eat some homemade veggie soup I have frozen.
The only two times I've wavered (or outright failed) so far were at my mom's house last Friday where I ate one peice of pizza, which is fine...but then my brother was eating these huge chunks of garlic cheese bread and dipping it in this sauce...so i ripped off a piece and went to town. It was good.
Then Sunday night Elijah and I shared a bowl of ice cream.
I do yoga in the early afternoon, and usually just running around after the kids and cleaning the house for exercise, although I ride my bike on the weekends and walk Elijah all around the neighborhood just to keep him busy.
So anyone want to do this diet with me?
Tomorrow I'll be posting Elijah's birth story. It's not a gross, scream-filled story...so don't worry.
After talking with her I decided to get out one of my photo memory boxes and post some old photos of us and of a few people that are my friends on facebook. I'll share a couple here too.
This is my mom in 1983. Cute! (and the jury is out on whether she is my friend on facebook or if my little sister, also on facebook even though she's 12, made her a fake profile)
This is me and Nat all dressed up to go to some Goth thingy. We're only 16 in this picture, which makes me very upset, considering I have daughters. Some much older girl dressed us up that night and I'm sure my parents had no idea what we were doing.
Me and Nat later that night, looking decidedly younger.
Nat and Jarred who ran the local record store I worked at as a kid. I'd rarely, if ever, get paid with anything other than manic panic hair dye, cd's or lp's.
This is me and my cousin Kristen at my high school graduation.
Tomorrow is my baby's birthday. Elijah is going to be 2 years old. It actually gave me slight butterflies to even post that.
I held down the weaning fort and haven't nursed him in ten days. I've also been dieting for ten days, but I don't have a scale so I have no idea if I'd made any progress.
I'm trying out the Lacto-Ovo-Pescetarian diet, even though most of my life I've been just your plain old run of the mill vegetarian. My dad has been a vegetarian since I was a small kiddo and we have very similar tastes, so it's much easier for me to not eat meat than your average bear.
I'm eating shellfish and fish this time so I can still go on my Japanese dates with Jeremiah and get my Pretty Girl roll!
Here is my new plan:
I've started eating cereal, measured out Multi-Grain cheerios and one piece of fruit for breakfast.
For lunch I try to eat all veggies. With maybe a little homemade dressing.
I have 1/4 of a cup of mixed nuts for a snack before the girls come home from school.
And one serving of whatever I'm making for dinner, unless it has meat in it...then I'll eat some homemade veggie soup I have frozen.
The only two times I've wavered (or outright failed) so far were at my mom's house last Friday where I ate one peice of pizza, which is fine...but then my brother was eating these huge chunks of garlic cheese bread and dipping it in this sauce...so i ripped off a piece and went to town. It was good.
Then Sunday night Elijah and I shared a bowl of ice cream.
I do yoga in the early afternoon, and usually just running around after the kids and cleaning the house for exercise, although I ride my bike on the weekends and walk Elijah all around the neighborhood just to keep him busy.
So anyone want to do this diet with me?
Tomorrow I'll be posting Elijah's birth story. It's not a gross, scream-filled story...so don't worry.
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
You Make a Deal with The Devil, You Get a Sale.
I got a etsy conversation the other day from a potential client wanting to know if she could see more hat photos to get a better idea of what kind of set to order for a gift. Rather than send her a bunch of photos I thought I'd post them on here and then if I get a request like that again I can just link them to this post. Voila!
I picked out a few custom order photos, plus all the newest ones...but left out one that I made recently for someone just with the off chance that she wanted to surprise whoever she ordered it for...and that they would look on my blog? haha. Well....that's probably a stretch.
Here is a flaps/no flaps design with vintage buttons and a mother/son set (plain beanies...cheaper set)
The scarf was 'super chunky' 'super long' and had vintage buttons at one end so you could turn the scarf into a kind of cowl. I made one for myself last year and wore it everytime I left the house! (I like that photo of myself for some reason.)
I threw these vintage buttons on the fingerless gloves as a whim, thinking she wouldn't like them...being that they're bright yellow and all. Instead she loved them and even wrote me an email later saying how often she wears them.
This set is the only custom order that I've had to 'do-over' multiple times. She originally wanted ear flaps, but her husband said they looked too 'Darth Vader' which I tended to agree with after looking at the photos. She loved the neckwarmer. The second pic was the hat I eventually came up with, which is still one of my favorite hats...thick but stretchy AND charcoal grey, which I love.
This is my sister Hannah and the hat I made for her for Christmas. So I guess that's not a custom order but it's a cute photo! The next one is silver and black and an adult hat order, but I sometimes have Rose model the adult hats just so I don't have to use SOOOO many photos of myself AND she's gorgeous, of course.
This is Max in a True Blue Helmet Head beanie. I like to give my hats dumb names...I never said I was all that mature, you know. The brown and tan hat was made for Twinkie. I just got an order for three more just like it from some chick up in Canada after seeing the pics of Rose I posted in this hat last week or whenever. So cool!
This first hat was made for Jeremiah's neice...I have photos of her wearing it somewhere and of course cannot find them. Anyways her mother told me her winter coat is hot pink and grey and when I finally gave her the hat it matched perfectly! Yay for me.
The second is a set of little girls sister hats. I usually don't do super girly stuff like this, but that's what the customer wanted. They're cute in their own way methinks.
On another note, I don't know if anyone remembers but I was offering much reduced store prices and custom order prices in my store until the end of September. If you want the reduced prices, even if you don't need the item for awhile, order now. You can either email me (oliverosetree@yahoo.com) and I can respond to you and then later send you an invoice that way, or you can go to my etsy shop, sign up and start a conversation with me...I'll make you a listing for a custom order and you can purchase it that way.
I'm also using the nicest high quality yarn now, which is also still super wash. I made a deal with the devil and got abbreviated shipping costs for it too! Sweet.
I'm also working on more delicate looking winter accessories (not so thick and chunky) like button up fingerless gloves and those headbands I post photos of before in many different colors. I'm using 100% Peruvian wool for the more delicate things and it's amazing how nice the stitches look.
I picked out a few custom order photos, plus all the newest ones...but left out one that I made recently for someone just with the off chance that she wanted to surprise whoever she ordered it for...and that they would look on my blog? haha. Well....that's probably a stretch.
Here is a flaps/no flaps design with vintage buttons and a mother/son set (plain beanies...cheaper set)
The scarf was 'super chunky' 'super long' and had vintage buttons at one end so you could turn the scarf into a kind of cowl. I made one for myself last year and wore it everytime I left the house! (I like that photo of myself for some reason.)
I threw these vintage buttons on the fingerless gloves as a whim, thinking she wouldn't like them...being that they're bright yellow and all. Instead she loved them and even wrote me an email later saying how often she wears them.
This set is the only custom order that I've had to 'do-over' multiple times. She originally wanted ear flaps, but her husband said they looked too 'Darth Vader' which I tended to agree with after looking at the photos. She loved the neckwarmer. The second pic was the hat I eventually came up with, which is still one of my favorite hats...thick but stretchy AND charcoal grey, which I love.
This is my sister Hannah and the hat I made for her for Christmas. So I guess that's not a custom order but it's a cute photo! The next one is silver and black and an adult hat order, but I sometimes have Rose model the adult hats just so I don't have to use SOOOO many photos of myself AND she's gorgeous, of course.
This is Max in a True Blue Helmet Head beanie. I like to give my hats dumb names...I never said I was all that mature, you know. The brown and tan hat was made for Twinkie. I just got an order for three more just like it from some chick up in Canada after seeing the pics of Rose I posted in this hat last week or whenever. So cool!
This first hat was made for Jeremiah's neice...I have photos of her wearing it somewhere and of course cannot find them. Anyways her mother told me her winter coat is hot pink and grey and when I finally gave her the hat it matched perfectly! Yay for me.
The second is a set of little girls sister hats. I usually don't do super girly stuff like this, but that's what the customer wanted. They're cute in their own way methinks.
On another note, I don't know if anyone remembers but I was offering much reduced store prices and custom order prices in my store until the end of September. If you want the reduced prices, even if you don't need the item for awhile, order now. You can either email me (oliverosetree@yahoo.com) and I can respond to you and then later send you an invoice that way, or you can go to my etsy shop, sign up and start a conversation with me...I'll make you a listing for a custom order and you can purchase it that way.
I'm also using the nicest high quality yarn now, which is also still super wash. I made a deal with the devil and got abbreviated shipping costs for it too! Sweet.
I'm also working on more delicate looking winter accessories (not so thick and chunky) like button up fingerless gloves and those headbands I post photos of before in many different colors. I'm using 100% Peruvian wool for the more delicate things and it's amazing how nice the stitches look.
Monday, September 21, 2009
S-A-T-U-R-D-A-Y Night!
Usually my Saturday nights are uneventful. I'm not complaining, I'm just stating a fact.
This Saturday night was made special and the tiniest bit exciting by two drunk kids, my across the street neighbor's porch, the police and the mystery citizen that called the police.
After we put Elijah to bed on Saturday nights Jeremiah usually plays the piano for awhile and I sit on the porch and read. (I've currently finished The Beasts by Joyce Carol Oates if anyone is still interested in a Book Club...I even took notes for discussion!)
It's 9pm and dark when I notice a car pull over behind my neighbor across the street's large Black Chevy Avalanche. I could hear people arguing, but couldn't make out what they were talking about. After 10 minutes of them sitting in their car arguing, I totally lost interest and went back to my book. The car starts to pull out and this is where the fun begins.
The car hits the back of the Chevy, gets stuck, the left side of it's fender caught on the right side of the Chevy's bumper. This is where the passenger starts yelling. I didn't catch his name through the nights hilarity, but he was tall and seemed pretty young. So we'll call him Tall Kid.
Tall Kid: "FUCKING STOP DUDE. STOP STOP STOP OH MY GOD STOP!!!!!!!!!"
At this point all the driver had to do was back up. Instead he just keeps going into the bumper and I hear headlights popping, glass shattering and screeeechinggggg.
Tall Kid:"STOP DUDE FUCK FUCK FUCK STOP YOU FUCKING IDIOT FUCKING STOP!"
And the driver does not stop. He finally frees himself from the bumper of the parked Chevy and speeds off past my house and down the street.
Tall Kid:"PULL OVER ASSHOLE. YOU TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR."
What? Hmmm...this is starting to get interesting. A mystery...why is Tall Kid not driving his car? The mystery deepens when the driver finally pulls over, stumbles out of the car and falls to the ground. Tall Kid jumps in the car and I think for sure he's going to take off. Instead he parks the car, comes back to the original driver and helps him up.
Tall Kid: "MIKE WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO?!?!! I TOLD YOU TO STOP."
Tall kid stands there for a few minutes and finally Mike says his peace.
Mike: "Dude I didn't hit your car. It's fine. Let's get out of here."
Tall kid begins to protest and Mike starts ShhhShhhShhhing him over and over again. It's so comical I laugh out loud, but stifle it pretty quickly. I'm not a paranoid person but two drunk kids probably don't want to have a chick laughing at their serious state of trouble.
And it gets even more serious.
For the next half hour Tall Kid and Mike push each other and fight up and down the sidewalk about whether or not they're going to notify the owner of the Chevy. I don't personally know the owners, but I've seen them many times and they are an elderly foreign couple, I don't want to guess at their ethnicity. I've heard another neighbor commenting that they're English is getting really good and I've also talked with their landlord about the man's poor health after an ambulance took him away one afternoon.
So the last thing I want is the two drunk kids to be bothering the couple late on a Saturday night. I feel bad for the kids cause I think they'll get the police called on them, I feel bad for the couple cause they'll probably be cowering in their apartment afraid.
Tall Kid proceeds to win after knocking Mike around quite a bit. In Tall Kid's defense Mike is one of the most annoying drunks I've ever seen. He keeps tossing around these gems...
Mike: "I didn't hit my car man! Remember??? We left it at your Grandma's house!"
"I love my girl man. Why the fuck would you tell me I don't."
"You're my best friend man. Why would I hit your car down by the creek? We don't even fish anymore Man....that's so sad dude."
"Just hit me! FUCKING HIT ME!"
Tall Kid: "It's not worth hitting you Man." Over and Over Again.
They finally make it to the porch and Mike lays in the neighbors front yard. I come inside and tell Jeremiah about what's going on. He tells me to stay out of it and I watch from the doorway now.
Mike gets up from time to time and bangs on the door. Tall Kid rings the bell repeatedly and talks to himself about his new car being smashed and how he's just trying to do the right thing.
They fight over and over again.
AND they're on these probably frightened people's porch for more than a half hour.
Finally their scuffles come to blows. Tall Kid punches Mike in the face, Mike pushes Tall Kid up against the railing and CRASH! The railing falls off of the porch. Tall Kid pushes Mike down the hand railing and CRASH! That railing wobbles and crumbles.
At this point I'm in shock.
I know maybe I should have called the cops...but I was more tempted to go and yell at the dumb assholes and tell them to leave a note and get the hell out of there. I was about to, but Jeremiah told me it might just make them more angry, so once again I stayed out of it.
The cops finally roll in just as Tall Kid and Mike make amends somehow and start to walk towards the car. Now Jeremiah gets interested and we both sit on our porch steps to watch.
The cops do the normal bla bla bla stuff, including a sobriety test during which Mike falls over hard, ends in him getting cuffed and put into the back of the cruiser.
Tall Kid brings the cop over to the car and shows him the Chevy and the damage. He's honest about the incident with the car, and the cop just has one question for him...
Cop: "Why would you let that kid drive your car?"
Tall Kid (eloquently): "I don't know dude. He just wanted to."
A while later all my other neighbors are out watching the scene. I've noticed that so far Tall Kid hasn't mentioned the railing to the cops. I know that I don't want the kid to get in trouble, but I also don't want the neighbors to fall coming down their front steps. Especially an elderly and ill old man.
I wrestle with the options for awhile. If I leave a note for the old couple than they'll probably be pissed I didn't tell the cops about their railing. If I tell the cops, the kids will probably get charged with Criminal Mischief if not more....
The cop is walking back past my house towards the Chevy and shines his light up at me. At this point I'm sitting alone, Jeremiah got bored with the goings on.
Cop: "Excuse me Ma'am. Did you happen to see any of this go on tonight?"
Erin:" Oh yes Sir! I saw the whole thing go down from beginning to end! How can I help you bring your task to fruition Sir?"
Okay so it wasn't like that, but essentially I told him that the kids were arguing on the porch for a long amount of time and broke the railing. I said I didn't want to tattle but I was afraid that someone would get hurt..etc...etc...
Cop: "Thank You, Ma'am. I'm glad you told me that...can I have your name, address and phone number, please?"
At this I start to balk. Before I could stop...
Erin: "Do I have to?"
At this the cop looks startled and annoyed.
Cop:"Ma'am, I'll try to keep you out of this but these kids are in some serious trouble and I need all the help I can get."
Erin:"Well...I just don't want to get them in any more trouble....they're just kids."
Cop: "Ma'am, people could have been seriously injured this evening. Please help me out."
Of course I saw the reason behind the whole thing. These kids were obviously not fit to be driving or even out in public while that incredibly intoxicated.
I give the cop my name address and phone number, apologize for being rude and go back to my house.
The damage is done. The kids are in some deep shit.
I still can't help but think I should have told them from the beginning to get the heck out of there.
The night ended with Tall Kid's car being towed and the cop leaving a note on the neighbor couple's front door and car dashboard. The railing still isn't fixed, but at least nobody got hurt.
And I got some excitement for my usually mundane Saturday night, but it's kind of hard to not wonder at what cost?
This Saturday night was made special and the tiniest bit exciting by two drunk kids, my across the street neighbor's porch, the police and the mystery citizen that called the police.
After we put Elijah to bed on Saturday nights Jeremiah usually plays the piano for awhile and I sit on the porch and read. (I've currently finished The Beasts by Joyce Carol Oates if anyone is still interested in a Book Club...I even took notes for discussion!)
It's 9pm and dark when I notice a car pull over behind my neighbor across the street's large Black Chevy Avalanche. I could hear people arguing, but couldn't make out what they were talking about. After 10 minutes of them sitting in their car arguing, I totally lost interest and went back to my book. The car starts to pull out and this is where the fun begins.
The car hits the back of the Chevy, gets stuck, the left side of it's fender caught on the right side of the Chevy's bumper. This is where the passenger starts yelling. I didn't catch his name through the nights hilarity, but he was tall and seemed pretty young. So we'll call him Tall Kid.
Tall Kid: "FUCKING STOP DUDE. STOP STOP STOP OH MY GOD STOP!!!!!!!!!"
At this point all the driver had to do was back up. Instead he just keeps going into the bumper and I hear headlights popping, glass shattering and screeeechinggggg.
Tall Kid:"STOP DUDE FUCK FUCK FUCK STOP YOU FUCKING IDIOT FUCKING STOP!"
And the driver does not stop. He finally frees himself from the bumper of the parked Chevy and speeds off past my house and down the street.
Tall Kid:"PULL OVER ASSHOLE. YOU TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR."
What? Hmmm...this is starting to get interesting. A mystery...why is Tall Kid not driving his car? The mystery deepens when the driver finally pulls over, stumbles out of the car and falls to the ground. Tall Kid jumps in the car and I think for sure he's going to take off. Instead he parks the car, comes back to the original driver and helps him up.
Tall Kid: "MIKE WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO?!?!! I TOLD YOU TO STOP."
Tall kid stands there for a few minutes and finally Mike says his peace.
Mike: "Dude I didn't hit your car. It's fine. Let's get out of here."
Tall kid begins to protest and Mike starts ShhhShhhShhhing him over and over again. It's so comical I laugh out loud, but stifle it pretty quickly. I'm not a paranoid person but two drunk kids probably don't want to have a chick laughing at their serious state of trouble.
And it gets even more serious.
For the next half hour Tall Kid and Mike push each other and fight up and down the sidewalk about whether or not they're going to notify the owner of the Chevy. I don't personally know the owners, but I've seen them many times and they are an elderly foreign couple, I don't want to guess at their ethnicity. I've heard another neighbor commenting that they're English is getting really good and I've also talked with their landlord about the man's poor health after an ambulance took him away one afternoon.
So the last thing I want is the two drunk kids to be bothering the couple late on a Saturday night. I feel bad for the kids cause I think they'll get the police called on them, I feel bad for the couple cause they'll probably be cowering in their apartment afraid.
Tall Kid proceeds to win after knocking Mike around quite a bit. In Tall Kid's defense Mike is one of the most annoying drunks I've ever seen. He keeps tossing around these gems...
Mike: "I didn't hit my car man! Remember??? We left it at your Grandma's house!"
"I love my girl man. Why the fuck would you tell me I don't."
"You're my best friend man. Why would I hit your car down by the creek? We don't even fish anymore Man....that's so sad dude."
"Just hit me! FUCKING HIT ME!"
Tall Kid: "It's not worth hitting you Man." Over and Over Again.
They finally make it to the porch and Mike lays in the neighbors front yard. I come inside and tell Jeremiah about what's going on. He tells me to stay out of it and I watch from the doorway now.
Mike gets up from time to time and bangs on the door. Tall Kid rings the bell repeatedly and talks to himself about his new car being smashed and how he's just trying to do the right thing.
They fight over and over again.
AND they're on these probably frightened people's porch for more than a half hour.
Finally their scuffles come to blows. Tall Kid punches Mike in the face, Mike pushes Tall Kid up against the railing and CRASH! The railing falls off of the porch. Tall Kid pushes Mike down the hand railing and CRASH! That railing wobbles and crumbles.
At this point I'm in shock.
I know maybe I should have called the cops...but I was more tempted to go and yell at the dumb assholes and tell them to leave a note and get the hell out of there. I was about to, but Jeremiah told me it might just make them more angry, so once again I stayed out of it.
The cops finally roll in just as Tall Kid and Mike make amends somehow and start to walk towards the car. Now Jeremiah gets interested and we both sit on our porch steps to watch.
The cops do the normal bla bla bla stuff, including a sobriety test during which Mike falls over hard, ends in him getting cuffed and put into the back of the cruiser.
Tall Kid brings the cop over to the car and shows him the Chevy and the damage. He's honest about the incident with the car, and the cop just has one question for him...
Cop: "Why would you let that kid drive your car?"
Tall Kid (eloquently): "I don't know dude. He just wanted to."
A while later all my other neighbors are out watching the scene. I've noticed that so far Tall Kid hasn't mentioned the railing to the cops. I know that I don't want the kid to get in trouble, but I also don't want the neighbors to fall coming down their front steps. Especially an elderly and ill old man.
I wrestle with the options for awhile. If I leave a note for the old couple than they'll probably be pissed I didn't tell the cops about their railing. If I tell the cops, the kids will probably get charged with Criminal Mischief if not more....
The cop is walking back past my house towards the Chevy and shines his light up at me. At this point I'm sitting alone, Jeremiah got bored with the goings on.
Cop: "Excuse me Ma'am. Did you happen to see any of this go on tonight?"
Erin:" Oh yes Sir! I saw the whole thing go down from beginning to end! How can I help you bring your task to fruition Sir?"
Okay so it wasn't like that, but essentially I told him that the kids were arguing on the porch for a long amount of time and broke the railing. I said I didn't want to tattle but I was afraid that someone would get hurt..etc...etc...
Cop: "Thank You, Ma'am. I'm glad you told me that...can I have your name, address and phone number, please?"
At this I start to balk. Before I could stop...
Erin: "Do I have to?"
At this the cop looks startled and annoyed.
Cop:"Ma'am, I'll try to keep you out of this but these kids are in some serious trouble and I need all the help I can get."
Erin:"Well...I just don't want to get them in any more trouble....they're just kids."
Cop: "Ma'am, people could have been seriously injured this evening. Please help me out."
Of course I saw the reason behind the whole thing. These kids were obviously not fit to be driving or even out in public while that incredibly intoxicated.
I give the cop my name address and phone number, apologize for being rude and go back to my house.
The damage is done. The kids are in some deep shit.
I still can't help but think I should have told them from the beginning to get the heck out of there.
The night ended with Tall Kid's car being towed and the cop leaving a note on the neighbor couple's front door and car dashboard. The railing still isn't fixed, but at least nobody got hurt.
And I got some excitement for my usually mundane Saturday night, but it's kind of hard to not wonder at what cost?
Friday, September 18, 2009
blemishes and lost promises
Can someone take these photos and get rid of the wrinkles and blemishes that are all over my dumb face and then send them back to me? Please? I'm so mad at my model, which is also me. How am I supposed to peddle my wares like this!!!???
o
Also, could someone find the person who is letting their dog shit in my yard and pummel them a wee bit?
I watched the kids walk down the slightly sloping front lawn to the sidewalk on their way to the bus stop with a big smile on my face. The air is brisk, the morning went relatively smooth and my children were happy and jaunty. About five steps out of the house Olivia slips in a giant pile of shit.
Luckily, I only had to change her shoes and not her clothes. But I'm still pissed as hell. And she was crying the whole way to the bus stop.
Also I'm thinking we should start a book club. And by we I'm talking about you. And you. And you. Everyone.
It seems like all my bright ideas just end up kind of shitty in the end though.
Remember when I wanted everyone to post about a strange encounter? Nobody did that.
Or when I told Becky (regarding this post) that:
"
Chuck is almost funnier than Jeremiah. Al-most.
o
Also, could someone find the person who is letting their dog shit in my yard and pummel them a wee bit?
I watched the kids walk down the slightly sloping front lawn to the sidewalk on their way to the bus stop with a big smile on my face. The air is brisk, the morning went relatively smooth and my children were happy and jaunty. About five steps out of the house Olivia slips in a giant pile of shit.
Luckily, I only had to change her shoes and not her clothes. But I'm still pissed as hell. And she was crying the whole way to the bus stop.
Also I'm thinking we should start a book club. And by we I'm talking about you. And you. And you. Everyone.
It seems like all my bright ideas just end up kind of shitty in the end though.
Remember when I wanted everyone to post about a strange encounter? Nobody did that.
Or when I told Becky (regarding this post) that:
"
Chuck is almost funnier than Jeremiah. Al-most.I don't have a really great memory...I'm not really sure what Jeremiah even looks like right now...so I don't think I could recount all of our conversations on my blog for your enjoyment. Let it suffice to say that he is funny."
And then she said:
"erin- we should have a contest to see who's funnier! i text myself when he says funny things so i can remember."
And then I said:
"Becky! We really should! I'll start writing that shit down yo!
And then we'll have a giveaway for one of my hats and everyone who votes on who's funnier, Chuck or Jeremiah, gets a entry in the giveaway!"
Yeah...that never happened either.
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